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LemonMeringue


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The Early Years

Seven months before LemonMeringue (whom I will refer to from now on as Lemon) was born, his father was kidnapped by Barbarians and thrown into prison. Although he struggled for many years to escape the prison, he never managed to break free and died several years later of chlamydia. You don't want to know what went on in that prison. Anyway, Lemon emerged from his mother, KeyLime, on February 29th, 1976. He attended Princeton University for preschool (he's Asian) and graduated in 1980 at the age of 4. He quickly became a leader in the business world as C.E.O. of FOOOOOORRRRRREEEEEMAAAAAAAAAAAAN MIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLSSSSSSSSSSSS. His success landed him multiple magazine covers and even a television commercial. At age 6, already a multi-millionaire, Lemon purchased the Detroit Lions and won multiple Super Bowls with stud players such as Barry Sanders. Lemon himself took a few snaps at quarterback and had a career QB Rating of 126.7, which is somewhere around the maximum but I'm too lazy to look up the actual max. On his seventh birthday Lemon received quite a surprise. His cake contained a hooker! This is, of course, any man's fantasy, but being only seven years old it was very illegal for something of this nature to happen, and Lemon received a prison sentence for 10-9,001 years. Luckily, due to his good behavior (in bed with the warden), he was released after just 10 years.

The Middle Years

Immediately after his prison release, Lemon set out to find the man of his dreams. Oh yeah, he's gay, did I mention that yet? Anyhow, with FOOOOOORRRRRREEEEEMAAAAAAAAAAAAN MIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLSSSSSSSSSSSS out of business and nobody to turn to (his mother had died when she accidentally jumped into a vat of nuclear waste), Lemon turned to prostitution himself. "It's like...I was already in jail, so why not just fuck for money? right?" said Lemon. He managed to work in this field for three years without getting caught, and once again became a millionaire. At the National Millionaire's Convention, Lemon ran into an old buddy, Donald Trump, and they hit it off instantly. Shortly after, the two lovers got married in a private ceremony in Las Vegas at a drive-thru Chapel called "Drive-Thru Chapel". Unfortunately, Lemon's asian personality clashed with Donald Trump's "America, Fuck yeah!" mentality. The couple got divorced in 1997, right around Lemon's 21th birthday. Lemon was so angry at the time that he wanted to consume more legal alcohol than anyone had ever consumed before. And he did. Then he went into a coma that lasted until the year 2007.

The Recent Years

When Lemon woke up from his coma, the old geezer in the hospital bed next to him was playing some radical new video game by the name of Guitar Hero. This old geezer, a wise man of sorts, taught Lemon all the guitar hero basics. He also taught him wtfhax trivia skills. Within weeks Lemon became a squeezing master and joined The Scorehero Institute of Plastic Guitars, which is where he is today. He also has the top score on the trivia IRC channel and no one can ever hope to beat him. Lemon also likes to think of himself as the best spammer ever, currently holding first overall in lines typed in the #scorehero IRC channel according to Deimos' newly created stats, beating former world champion psxfreak101.

-A Biography by User_footballtom3685 footballtom3685 - with edits by diddin, and psxfreak101



Recently Meng used his extreme levels of charisma to put together a RB2 band with Mystakin, sburymadness, and Matt276 called The Card Sharps. In order to level the playing field with other bands, Matt276 broke his own wrist, Mystakin broke his bass pedal, sbury stabbed himself in the throat, and Meng practiced a lot of RB2.

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